Poet Nicole Capó Martínez Wants You to Stay Soft and to Practice Self-Love

Based in Washington D.C., Nicole Capó Martínez Boricua writer and artist has recently released a new book of poems, soft machine (2020) and stay soft (2020), a workbook to motivate you to practice softness and kindness, towards your self and others.

She describes her motto “stay soft” in one of her books as: “some days you feel like you’re living with a hole inside of you. On those days, it helps to ask yourself: what makes you soft? This is a manifesto for radical self-love, a guide for your journey towards discovering yourself.” And I don’t know about you, but I think we all need this right now. You can find more about this in her collection of poems that can be purchased through Duende District here.

Nicole is also the founder of Curandera Club, a club to motivate and practice radical self-love. She has lived a hundred different lives working in television, journalism, the arts, hospitality, and cheesemongering. “These days, I sling flowers at She Loves Me. Scorpio sun, Sagittarius moon, Leo rising”, she says.

You can follow her on Instagram @nicole.capo. You can also find links to her essays and articles on her website. Check out the interview below to learn more about her thoughts regarding Dignidad Literaria and our current situation.

What does Dignidad Literaria mean to you?

Dignidad Literaria means creating space for the most vulnerable and invisible communities around us. It means making our voices heard and making sure we’re creating platforms for others to make their voices heard as well. Often I hear folx talk about intersectionality without actually stopping to think about what it means; Dignidad Literaria challenges us to face our own prejudices and stereotypes, take a step back, and hand over the mic.

Can you share with us a couple of sentences that you were going to read during the Dignidad Literaria event that got canceled?

Here’s a piece from my collection, soft machine, that I was planning on reading:

mujer:

sangre:

yerba viva

la que deslumbra la luna:

montañosa,
inmovible,
perspicaz

y capaz
tal vez
de derrumbar
un pueblo entero con una sola mirada

fiera o diosa

salvaje y cruel

Mujer.

How is this situation affecting your work?

I work in retail for my full-time job, so the current pandemic crisis has severely curtailed our operations. We’re lucky to be in a position where we’ve been able to continue making it work by offering deliveries, but it’s definitely been a challenge transitioning to working from our homes, and balancing managing these changes while also taking time to self-care and work through the anxiety brought on by the current state of affairs.

Do you have any anxiety tips to share with the rest of us?

I read an interview recently with grief expert David Kessler where he explained that, while we are likely not aware of it, what we’re currently experiencing is collective grief on a scale we’ve never known before. Once we recognize what we’re feeling as grief, we can begin the work of allowing it to move through us the way it needs to so we can finally process and accept it, which is where our power lies.

What’s your go-to comfort food?

There’s nothing like a toasted mallorca with ham and cheese and a café con leche to really make me feel like I’m home no matter how far away I may be.

How can we keep each other safe?

We can check in with each other, even if it’s just a quick “How are you doing?” text. We can try to share good news and joyful moments (and try not to linger on or spread negative information or news). We can offer to help each other in whatever ways we can (if you feel comfortable going to the store, perhaps offer to pick up groceries for an elderly or immunocompromised neighbor). We can continue to stay home to the extent possible.

What are you currently reading? Any books that you would like to recommend us?

I just started The Year of the Witching by Alexis Henderson. I recently finished Lakewood by Megan Giddings after not being able to put it down for several days! If you’re like me and take comfort in dark, creepy, and mysterious stories, I can’t recommend it enough.

Any TV shows/movies that you would like to recommend us? (We’ll add them to our social distancing list)

Little Fires Everywhere and High Fidelity, both on Hulu.

What type of music is in your playlist?

I’m all over the place with my musical taste, but have recently been getting into Flor de Toloache after hearing about them on an episode of Code Switch.